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And Down the Stretch They Come!

AND DOWN THE STRETCH THEY COME!!!!!!!!

If the September leg of American League playoff run was a horse race, it would look and sound a lot little bit like this

and The Idiots are the ¾ mile marker (Sept 1st) with a 2 ½ length lead over Don’s Stache and a 4 length lead over The Pride of Roger Dorn and pulling away…now as they go into the back stretch they open up a 4 ½ length lead over Don’s Stache (Sept 11th) but here comes The Pride of Roger Dorn on the outside, The Pride of Roger Dorn is flying around the back stretch and heading into the final leg he’s really turning it on(Sept 18th) AND NOW THE PRIDE OF ROGER DORN HAS TAKEN THE LEAD, and the Idiots are now falling back with Don’s Stache. Don’s Stache now with a neck lead (Sept 21st) ….but the Idiots pull back up next to Don’s Stache (Sept 24th) as they both make a move on The Pride of Roger Dorn (Sept 25th)and HERE THEY COME OUT OF THE BACK STRETCH WITH THE PRIDE OF ROGER DORN LEADING BY NOSE OVER DON’S STACHE AND THE IDIOTS!!!!

AND DOWN THE STRETCH THEY COME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(SEPTEMBER 26TH)

(sniff sniff) Ya smell that? Smells like… crisp, cool autumn air. Smells like late September. Smells like Playoff Baseball.

This year it looks were gonna get a bonus playoff series. A best of 3 for the American League East Championship, as the Indians laugh all the way to the Wild Card spot.

That’s the way it looks like it’s gonna play out, unless the Indians fall apart this week against the D-Rays, the Yankee/Red Sox series next weekend is going to be a do-or-die for one spot. If the Indians can remain even with the Yanks and Sox this week (which they most likely will) all they will need to do is win 2 out 3 this weekend vs. a White Sox team that will be in party/rest mode for the upcoming ALDS. The White Sox will be probably pitch Floyd Bannister, Rich Dotson, and Steve Trout against the Indians. The only hope for the Yanks and Sox is the White Sox lose 3 games this week, making the Indian/White Sox series important to the White Sox, otherwise we’re looking at……….

NEW YORK YANKEES AT BOSTON RED SOX, BEST 2 OUT 3 FOR THE AMERICAN LEAGUE EAST CHAMPIONSHIP

The thought of that is just downright terrifying. The Yankees were in a very nice position until Joe Torre decided to start Jaret Wright Saturday instead of Aaron Small (apparently he didn’t talk to the doctors like he was supposed-Torre article). A decision that could come back to haunt the Yankees come Monday October 3rd. In case you missed it, Wright got lit up for 7 runs in 1 1/3 innings, followed by Aaron Small (9-0 3.25era) coming in and pitching 6 2/3 SHUTOUT innings. The Yankees lost the lead that day, and now they head out on the road to close the season, playing 4 in Baltimore this week before the apocalyptic 3 game series vs. the Red Sox this weekend.

The Red Sox are now in command with 4 at home this week vs. the pesky Jays, and then the final 3 games at home vs. the Yanks. It was a huge weekend for the Sox who needed to pull even with the Yanks coming into today, and did that with a clean sweep of the Orioles. The way the Sox are looking at this is, get 3 out 4 against Toronto this week and hope the Yankees split. In any scenario, as long as the red sox aren’t trailing in the standings they will have a MAJOR advantage this weekend having all 3 games in their building.

The Indians, who are idle today, open a 3 game set vs. the Devil Rays on Tuesday. Scott Elarton (11-7), pitched an absolute gem vs. the White Sox last week, will face young lefty stud Scott Kazmir (9-9). The best chance for D-Rays to steal one is on Tuesday with Kazmir on the hill. Kazmir poses problems for the lefties in the Cleveland order. I think the D-Rays will take this one, and the Indians will take the next two.

The Yankees will be in Baltimore tonight with the Randy Johnson (15-8) vs. Rodrigo Lopez (14-11). The Orioles have lost 8 straight which doesn’t bode well for those of us who believe in the law of averages. They are bound to win someday, hopefully not until Friday. Johnson pitched a gem his last time out and hopes to carry that over into tonight. He finally had that sharp slider that’s been missing all season. If Johnson is effective tonight it’s because he will have his nasty slider working. When it’s not, Johnson tries to throw the ball by people, and since he’s throwing 92mph instead of 98mph these days, it becomes a fat pitch to hit. Rivera threw 38 pitches yesterday so his availability for tonight’s game is still up in the air, he usually lets Torre know after BP if he available to pitch

The Red Sox will play host to the Blue Jays. Curt Schilling (7-8) will face Dave Bush (5-10). It is a very big start for the inconsistent Schilling who could use another shot of confidence before he faces the Yankees on Saturday. The Blue Jays are good young team, and will be a lot tougher for the Sox than the Orioles were this past weekend.

Instant Credibility?

The ACC vs. The Big East Okay, let's get over the fact that while Virginia Tech, Boston College and Miami were in The Big East, they were constantly underrated. Writers and critics said that they shouldn't even have a BCS bid. Then the ACC comes in, like a thief in the night, and steals Virginia Tech, Miami and Boston College. The Big East never got any crediblity in the polls, even when there teams were undefeated or playing great football. Now we are in the first year of the new ACC and I look at the polls to begin the season, and all former teams Big East teams are ranked in the Top 25. Instant credibility. Where did that come from. Why weren't these teams getting this respect when they were in the Big East? I understand why the schools left. Why not join a superconference it is the way you have to go. That is a column for another time. My big question is why do the former Big East teams all of a sudden have this instant credibility amongst the pollsters? What made Boston College a pre-season Top 25 team. I read articles and heard commentators state that Boston College had a chance to win the ACC in its inagural year. Boston College over Miami, Florida State and Virginia Tech? Right now the ACC has 3 teams in the top 10. Miami already has a loss. They have two other teams in the Top 25. BC and Georgia Tech. Both will losses. Where is all this respect coming from? More importantly how come it wasn't there when these teams were in the Big East?

Smooth Jimmy vs. The Shark Week 4

It was not a good week at all for the Shark. After a blistering 5-1 start the Shark stumbled across the finish line at 2-3 last week. Let's see how we can make that up to you.

Alabama -15 vs. Arkansas : Alabama has a stifling defense. Arkansas is awful. Alabama has a good Quarterback. Arkansas is awful. Alabama once had the great Forrest Gump. Arkansas is awful. Do you sense the theme here? Honestly, Arkansas lost to Vanderbilt by 4 and USC by 53. I am not sure which one is worse. Alabama is the most underrated team in America, with a smothering defense. Take Alabama and give the points, Run Forrest, Run!

Illinois +10.5 Michigan State: Here are the only numbers you need to know. Michigan State is a straight up 9-1 against the last 10 Top Ten teams they have played. The week after that they are a straight up 3-7. Classic sandwich game. Notre Dame last week, Michigan next week. In sneaks Illinois, add a dash of over confidence and take Illinois and the 10.5 points.

Purdue +3.5 Minnesota : Purdue is a good team. Minnesota is a good team at home. This should be a good game, but I think Purdue will win it outright. If they don't, you have 3.5 points in your back pocket which should be enough to cover. Take Purdue and the Points

Smooth Jimmy

Smooth Jimmy had a good week last week. So, I took that scratch and hopped a plane to Vegas to meet my Vegas wife Cookie (stage name). That’s why I had my buddy, Hubie Brown, guest write the NFL picks last week. He went 1-2, he kinda screwed ya, but the man knows his stuff. Trust me. He made me sit in on a 3 hour lecture he gave at UNLV on “Moving Without the Ball”. They literally had to drag him off the stage, and he couldn’t have been more than 20% through his lecture.
His picks were lousy, and so I owe you one…so here are my 3 college selections for this week. Let’s just say a little birdie whispered something to Jimmy last night

This week, I’m gonna pick the only 3 games worth caring about. The tripleheader you should be watching Saturday, starting at noon with……….

#21 Iowa AT # 8 THEE Ohio State University

Make no mistake; OSU is one of the best teams in the country. They lost to a Texas team who I thought was the best looking team Texas I have ever seen. OSU welcomes a tough Iowa team to The Horseshoe and will spot’em 7. OSU can actually score this year AND play D. I like the Buckeyes, playing with a serious chip on their shoulder, to win this one 27-14. TAKE The Ohio State University, GIVE THE 7.

Which brings us to the 3:30est game……

#15 Georgia Tech AT #4 Virginia Tech

I like Georgia Tech a lot. Reggie Ball and Calvin Johnson are a lethal combination, but they are playing in Blacksburg against a, better than most people want to believe, Va. Tech team. Normally I wouldn’t touch this game but who do you want me to see me pick? Army vs. Buffalo? Since I am gonna touch this game, we need to try and make this simple. Can Georgia Tech win at Va. Tech? mmm probably not? Is 11.5 points enough to take Georgia Tech? mmm. Probably. Someone once told me if you don’t think a team can win, then give the points and take the favorite. But the Birdie told me to take Georgia Tech. GT plays them close, but loses late 28-24.
TAKE GEORGIA TECH AND THE 11.5

And the night game, game three, and the game most likely to be 97-64…at Halftime….

#1 USC AT #24 OREGON

The PAC-10 has been down recently, but seems to making a comeback with Arizona St, Oregon, UCLA, and of course USC. There isn’t much to say about USC that everyone doesn’t know, except that things apparently are getting chippy in practice because Pete Carroll did such a good job recruiting the last 2 years that he has 3rd and 4th string guys who would start for almost any other team in the country watching on the bench. USC is so loaded that they have 7 Mr. Football’s from 2005 that haven’t even played a down, or have been red-shirted. So what’s that mean for this game? The USC guys who are winning depth chart battles can’t afford to play sub-par games. To keep there jobs they need to play every down, which is not good at all for Oregon. Matt Leinart is almost 100% after off-season elbow surgery and their offense scores at absolute will. Unless Oregon scores 42 I can’t see them covering. USC walks right into Oregon, gives them a taste, and gets back on the bus. USC wins this one 63-24 (scoring 42 in the 1st half). TAKE USC, GIVE THE 21.

This is my PARLAY of the year right here, so don’t say Smooth Jimmy never did nothin’ for ya…..OSU, GT and USC…bet $100 to win $567

Until next week….

Inside the Mind of Joe Torre

            This pennant race is enough to drive me insane. In September the Yankees are usually in cruise control. This time of year The Yanks are usually giving guys days off, lining up their starters for the playoffs, and visiting local strip clubs. It’s the time of year Mariano Rivera sneaks out of the clubhouse and goes to Puerto Rico for a few days to re-charge the battery {read: arm) Not this year. This year they dug themselves too deep of a hole and have had to play .650 baseball to stay in the hunt.

           This year’s version of the Yankees playoffs started a week ago. Meaning Mariano is not lounging on the beach in

San Juan

and rumor has it he was actually seen lying in the fetal position, holding his shoulder, crying after Tuesday’s game.

            Joe Torre is also new to this pennant race stuff, so you can only imagine he’s exhausted from having to pay attention for this long without a break, and it seems to have affected some of the decisions he has made over the past 2 months. I think Joe may be starting to break down, I can only imagine what’s going through his head as he has been submerged in this pressure cooker for weeks with no end in sight.

            Since George has equipped Joe with the ‘Thought Stealer 3000’ we actually have a transcript of his thoughts we acquired from a dumpster outside of the stadium. Here are some excerpts:

-         Boy, Randy has pitched great tonight, but that’s no reason to think can do again in the 9^th inning. It would be asking too much of him, I’ll just bring in Mo for the 43^rd straight day. He’ll be fine! (Rivera hides behind the monuments when he sees Torre go out to the mound)

-         If Cashman won’t get Embree off my fucking team I’ll throw him out there every goddamn day until he gets the picture. Same way I did with Felix fucking Heredia!!!

-         Look at the mustache on Donnie, will ya? Jesus, I bet his mustache could hit .320.

-         (writing on a post-it) Remind Doc to make SURE he tells Jaret Wright his elbow is shattered in 43 pieces

-         (item 2 on post-it) Pick up anti-anxiety medication for Tommy [

Gordo

n]

-         (item 3 on post-it) Hot Dogs, Chili, Ex-Lax, Depends, Diet Mr. Pib,

Gordo

n’s Gin

-         I need to ask Tanyon why he thought it was a good idea to stop taking steroids

-         Why is Lou Pinella sitting in the owner box with George? Why are they both rubbing they’re hands together and nodding knowingly?

-         I don’t know why I thought Willie (in the subway commercial) would understand what I meant by [palm up, palm down, palm up, palm down] It’s not like there is a universal sign for ‘fresh toasted’

-         Who is that guy sitting at the end of the bench? #45? I need to check the roster. He look like that guy who pitched against us in the World Series in 2003

-         I hope Jason was smart enough to buy a whizzinator

-         If we actually do make the World Series, I better get oral sex for the job I did. I had to use Aaron Fucking Small as my 3^rd starter for month, and they guy who wears his hat crooked as the 4^th starter. I still don’t know how to say his name. It’s like the song, right? Cha-ca-con?

-         I wish Mo would stop crying like a 3^rd grader and get off the shower floor

-         If George fires me he STILL has to pay me $13 million. Good stuff.

-         I wonder who gets more tail, Robinson or Derek?

-     Who should I take out of the rotation now that Moose is back? Small? Ch-ca-con?            Wright? Don’s ‘Stache?

Those were the only ones we could make sense of. Many were inaudible, unfortunately.

In all seriousness though, Joe is starting to fall apart a little here. With a big 10 days coming up, and that ridiculously scary 3 game series in Fenway next weekend, I’m scared Joe hasn’t had any time to relax. He’s been going 100% for 4 moths now and it’s wearing him down. It’s not hard to see. It should be a GUT wrenching last 10 days.

I’m backing off all predictions from the last

AL

report. I handed the White Sox the AL Central forgetting they haven’t played a big game all season and apparently are not too good in them. They look like they’ll be the 1^st team in history to blow a FIFTEEN game lead in September. I would love to see it.

Starting Tomorrow: The Daily AL Report through the end of the regular season…That’s if I don’t die of a massive heart attack

            

Sunday Killers Week 2

Sunday Killers: Week 2

At 12:59 I made my final roster adjustment and sat back for an exciting day of football. I positioned my chips, dips, drinks and other essentials close by and was ready to watch my team run wild. By the time I settled in I had already lost. Both Terrell Owens and Chad Johnson had already caught two long TDs and were on their way to big days. The cap was still on my first beer, the seven layer dip had not even been breached yet and my day was ruined. Thanks Terrell and Chad. It looks like it is going to be one of those years.

Daunte Culpepper QB Minnesota Vikings : Last year I proclaimed to the world on national radio that Daunte Culpepper was overrated and could hurt your fantasy team. So far this year, 8 INTs and 0 TDs. I think he is the first quarterback in the history of the NFL that has negative points after two weeks. If he were a pitcher he would have been pulled in the first inning.

Jamal Lewis RB Baltimore Ravens : I can tell that my partners’ patience is running thin with me and Jamal Lewis. We had the 5th overall pick of the draft with Holmes, LDT, McGahee and Alexander all gone before us. My partner wanted Domanick Davis, then later in the week wanted Julius Jones or Deuce McAlister. I wanted Jamal Lewis All along. I feel like I talked him into it. Right now he is fuming. I think Jamal will be okay, but he is certainly making me look bad right now. Another poor showing, 10 carries and 9 yards. Ouch.

Chris Brown and Travis Henry Tennessee Titans : I am glad I stayed away from this situation; it looks like it is going to be trouble all year long. Henry had 18 carries for 62 yards and Brown had 8 carries for 33 yards. The concept of two running backs looks good on paper, but so did Gigli and we all saw how that turned out. Much like rock groups, someone also emerges as the more talented one. Take ‘Nsync for example, it is Justin Timberlake’s band, not Joey Fatone’s. Uh oh, I have said too much.

Joey Harrington QB Detroit Lions : The good news for Harrington owners is that they probably won’t have to read about this much longer, because I can’t see Harrington having much slack left on his leash. If Jeff Garcia wasn’t hurt, he would be starting next week. As it stands I wouldn’t be surprised if Dan Orlovsky gets the start. 19 for 37, 196 yards, 1 TD and 5INTs is not getting it done. Letting Joey Harrington run this team is worse than giving Tara Reid her own TV show. However, it is still better than Culpepper.

Chad Pennington QB New Jersey Jets : I don’t care about the stats. Statistically he had a sound game; realistically he may be the worst QB in the NFL. I watched the entire first quarter of the game and watched Pennington fumble and then throw a ball that had more hang time than Mr. Cooper. Justin McCareins looked like he was fielding a punt and if he could have he would have called for a fair catch. He never had a strong arm, but this is ridiculous.

Ahman Green RB Green Bay : I can’t say that I am surprised at the lack of production from Ahman Green this year. His decline started last year and looks like it is going to continue. 16 carries for 54 yards and 5 catches for 45 yards with 0 TDs. It is like watching the decline of Anthony Michael Hall. He came out of the box fast with a few great years and now is struggling to stay on the A-List of Running Backs. The parallels are remarkable.

Michael Vick QB Atlanta Falcons : People still draft him early and still get upset when they get this type of game from him. This is a typical Michael Vick game, 11-19, 123 Yards and 1 TD, tack on 43 yards rushing and there you have it. This is typical game from Vick. I understand the desire to have Vick, because every once in a while he will break an 80 yard TD run and throw for 250 yards. Michael Vick has the lure of the siren’s song, don’t fall for it. If you own him, wait for a good game and then trade him.

Extra Points

Sign-makers: : Every week we turn on College football and the NFL and you see the signs throughout the stands. You see things like: ABC Another Beating by Colorado or something clever like that. Some of these signs look pretty expensive. I have been to tradeshows in which the vendors’ signage can’t compare to some of the things I see in stadiums. What really makes me wonder about the authors and creators of these masterpieces are two things; 1)when do these people have time to make these things and how long does it take to make one of these signs and 2) can’t they come up with something a little more clever than they usually do. I mean I am guessing these people are wasting a solid five or six hours of work time, using company supplies and resources and spending hours thinking of just the perfect thing to say. I don’t know, maybe I am being too hard, but maybe we need a contest or something. I just feel that if you are going to take the time to make the sign or banner then you should really get your money’s worth. Please submit your favorite or worst signs to [email protected] If you are a sign maker and need help with a clever slogan or witty line, drop us a line and we can help you out.

Fantasy Sports Network : We are still pitching the idea of the Fantasy Sports Network to anyone that will listen. To sum up, we are looking to broadcast live events, such as football and host shows in a sportscenter manner with the focus specifically on fantasy sports. Imagine listening to an announcer yell at a player when he fumbles, “You just cost me two points Jerk Ass!” Of course, gambling would be worked into this. Imagine a team up by 14 points with a 14.5 point spread, 1minute 30 seconds left and the ball on the other teams’ one inch line. The coach tells the QB to run out the clock and kneel on the ball. Would you rather watch a broadcast with announcers that can empathize with you or listen to Phil Simms critique a 15 yard out pattern from a back up QB? Let’s make it happen people.

Smooth Jimmy vs. The Shark Week 2

Smooth Jimmy vs. The Shark Week 2

After a rough opening weekend, 1-2 for the Shark and 2-1 for Smooth Jimmy, we will see if we can get you guys some real money this week.

Smooth Jimmy

(Smooth Jimmy is unavailable today. Apparently after winning his TCU bet last night he took the late flight out to Las Vegas. Jimmy was nice enough to call his good buddy Hubie Brown, who was able to fax me his pick from Ruby II’s down in Bridgeport where he was enjoying the “2 Dances for 1” and lunch special)

Hey Guys, Hubie Brown here. You know what you’re saying to yourself. You like Hubie, he’s good a guy and but how is he going to help me with my picks. Hopefully you look at my hair, see its perfect, and realize you’re rolling with the smoothest operator. A guy with perfect hair like me has gotta have picks with upside…so here my picks

Minnesota +3 Cincinnati - Now. You’re the Minnesota Vikings. You just lost a terrible game to the Bucs and your wondering how you can win this week when you lost arguably your best player in Randy Moss in the off-season, and you’re coached by a guy who’s dumb enough to sells his Super Bowl tickets for less than face value? Then you realize your playing the Bengals. TAKE THE VIKES AND THE POINTS .

Carolina -1 New England - Ok, now you’re the Panthers. You have the best D in the league and all people want to talk about his how injury prone your RB’s and all the problems that you’ve had to deal with since the Super Bowl two years ago. You got the defending champs in your building and your coming off a tough loss. You know how you win this game? By posting up…Julius Peppers… on Tom Brady…You give the ball… to the big fella…and let him go to work. TAKE CAROLINA, GIVE THE POINT ..(HOPE JULIUS PEPPERS DOESN’T GET INTO FOUL TROUBLE)

Atlanta +1 Seattle - Now. You know how much I love the Falcons. Michael Vick’s upside is unlimited! The Seahawks are just not on the same level as the Falcons. My hair loves the Falcons and their unlimited upside. This one will be the biggest blow out since I blew out my perm in 86 when I coached the Knickerbockers. TAKE THE FALCONS, TAKE THE POINT , TAKE THE POINT, GO TO MY GIRL AT SUPERCUTS LAQUISHA, AND ASK FOR THE HUBIE B.

Thanks Hubie. Smooth Jimmy may or may not be back in time for next week’s picks…Stay tuned for a Vegas update later on…..

The Shark

Once again I find myself liking very few games this weekend. Sometimes it is better to pass on a few games rather than force them. I htink anyone who puts money on the Saints-Giants game is asking for trouble. Is it a home game, away game, will the fans they flew up from New Orleans big a factor? Too many questions, no answers, stay away. Here are some I do like.

San Diego +2.5 Denver : I think Denver is in trouble, I don't like there defense, I don't like the running back situation, and when you add all of that up, you get jake Plummer tryingto do too much. I.E. throw left-handed passes. On the other hand, Antonio Gates is back. This should free up LDT for some more catches and yardage. Champ Bailey is banged up and Drew Brees can exploit that. Take the Chargers plus the points .

Atlanta +1 Seattle : I think we have seen this before. The Seahawks are alreayd falling apart. The Falcons look like the real deal. Their defense is definitely the real deal and I think that will be the difference. The Falcons defense will hold the Seahawks offense in check enough for the Falcons offense to win the game. Take the Falcons and the point .

Jacksonville +9 Indianapolis : I would be very disappointed if the Jags couldn't cover this. They are ready to take it to the next level and a close game with Indianapolis is a must. The Jags gave the Colts fits last year. The Jags offense is pretty solid and their defense is top notch. I look for a 21-20 type game. Take the Jags and the points .

Smooth Jimmy vs the Shark week 3

Smooth Jimmy vs the Shark Week 3

After another stellar week the Shark has raised his record to 5-1 on the year and it hsould have been 6-0 because LSU did not score on that touchdown pass with 45 seconds left in the game. ASU was robbed, but there are worse gambling sotires around than that. We all have them and maybe one day we can post them on this site. In fact, if you have a gambling war story, please email me at [email protected] and we will post the ten best stories.

On with the picks:

The Shark
This week there are a few games that i like, I don't love them but I like them.

Boston College -1 vs. Florida State : I don't think that Florida State has a very good team this yearand I think BC is for real. There are a few questions I have. One, will the fans (self-described SuperFans) come out and support the Eagles this weekend. I have been to many games at Chesnut HIll and the fans absolutely suck. Two, does BC think they are better than Florida State. Florida State gets three points from teams like this, just by showing up. The Eagles won't take it easy, but they will take it, take BC give the point.

Virginia -9.5 vs. Syracuse : Syracuse is going to struggle this year. Based solely on that, I am going with the Cavaliers in this one. Take Virginia give the 9.5 points.

Oklahoma +6.5 vs. UCLA : I don't like the Pac-10, other than USC the rest of he conference is soft and weak. I just can't see Oklahoma losing this game. That is what it comes down to. Take Oklahoma and take the points.

Wisconsin -3 vs. North Carolina : Have you seen Wisconsin play this year. No one is talking about Colorado transfer Brian Calhoun, put he may be the best running back i nthe nation. He is small and quick, with moves like a young Amos Zereoue. The Badgers have the beef on the line on both sides and the skill where it matters. Wisconsin is a solid team. Take Wisconsin and give the three points even on the road.

USC -30.5 vs. Arkansas : Arkansas gave up 408 yards to Vanderbilt last week. Do I need to write anything more about this? Take USC and give the points.


Smooth Jimmy

Smooth Jimmy had to change his phone number again last week after he laid a knot on the super sucky, Washington Huskies. The suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked. After going 1-10 last year, and the loss to Air Force (a very underrated Air Force team according to Ty Willingham I might add), I thought they were due! I mean c’mon, they brought in a coach that a lot people felt, after he was fired from Notre Dame for single-handedly bringing the program down, would bring the Huskies back to the national prominence! (Editors Note: It was the academic standards. That’s why Charlie Weis won’t be able to win there eith…what?..they’re 0-2? They beat #3 Michigan in Ann Arbor? Oh…well..would have been nice if someone had told me before I made an ass of myself!. Never mind…continue)

Well, I bit that sour apple, as I’m sure most of you did. So Jimmy is gonna make it up to you. Jimmy doesn’t like to lose.
So this week, I’m gonna stay away from teams I have a “feeling” about and give you 3 picks you can parlay into family style dinner at Uncle Mo’s (When you order his million dollar fries he actually sits there while you eat!!! Don’t get the beer battered tacos whatever you do, not so nice, ask the downstairs neighbors)
Get your #2 pencils out people, time to get that money you so desperately need.

UTAH -3.5 TCU

For what it’s worth, I think Utah should be GETTIN 2!!! Instead, the guys in Vegas missed with this one badly. Now I know TCU lost last week to a team that was given the NCAA Death Penalty (SMU) for cheating back in the early 90’s, but they also beat Oklahoma the week before that. Since the game is the ESPN Thursday Night game you can only hope the “good” TCU comes out to play tonight. Let’s start Thirsty Thursday on high note and put dime on the Horned Frogs. How could you not bet on team called the Horned Frogs? TAKE TCU AND THE POINTS.

BC -1.5 FLORIDA ST

Bobby Bowden is getting old. So old that he only has the energy to recruit defensive players now. They did have a few offensive players off last years team drafted. One guy was named, Craphonso. I like that name. Craphonso. Anyway, BC is better than they have been in a few years, but Florida St’s defense is loaded with NFL caliber talent. This game will be probably as Craphonso as the Miami/ Florida St game was last week, but you gotta like the ‘Noles to win in conference. Yes, B.C is in the Atlantic Coast Conference. Very low scoring game. Take Florida St and give the 1.5 points

ND -6.5 MICHIGAN ST

Michigan St always plays ND tough, and this seems like the perfect week for the Irish to let down their guard. After two tough road wins, Charlie Weis has got to be wondering when those pesky academic standards are gonna cost him a game. If they lose to Michigan St this week you can bet somebody in the admission department will get the ax for not giving Charlie the weapons that he needed to beat the Spartans. As much as I would like to pick against the Irish as to set the old reverse jinxer on the Spartans, I can’t see how the Irish will lose the home opener (or how the refs will let them), knowing how important it is to go into that USC game undefeated. Take ND and give the 6.5

There are Smooth Jimmy’s LOCKS OF THE WEEK!!!

Last week’s 1-2 picks were just practice by the way. I knew Notre Dame was gonna go into the big house, lacking all that talent that southern schools steal with their “4.3 40’s = Admission” policies, and win handily. Don’t forget, when your right 52% of the time…..

Till next week….

AL Playoff Race

With a little more than 2 weeks to go in the baseball season the only thing we know is the White Sox will represent the AL Central. Other than that, pretty much anything can happen.

AL East Race

The AL East race between the Red Sox and Yankees may come down to the 3 game series, the final weekend in Fenway. While most baseball fans are hoping the Yankees can stay close enough to make that series a do or die, the fact is, that series will most likely be the Yankees playing for their playoffs lives. The Red Sox have 18 games left, most of them at home. If they go 10-5 in their next 15 games, the Yankees, who have 16 games in that time, would have to go 12-4 to have any shot of winning the AL East. The Yankees have to come in to that series 1 game out, otherwise they would need to sweep the Red Sox, in Fenway, the last series of the season to win the division. The odds of that happening are slim to none. It would be a right up there with 1978 and 1986 for most heartbreaking endings to the season for the Red Sox. So, realistically, the Yankees have their sights set on the wild card, regardless of what the Yankees tells you. Even Red Sox fans know that the 2 ½ game lead they hold right now is enormous based on the schedules remaining for the two teams.

AL West and Wildcard

So the last two

AL

spots will be four team battle headed by the A’s, Angels, Yankees, and Indians.

One game separates the A’s and Angels in the west. The West could be decided this week as the A’s have a 1 more game in Cleveland and 4 in Boston, while the Angels play 1 more in Seattle and host the Tigers for 4 games this weekend.

The Angels should go, at worst, 3-2. While the A’s will be lucky to escape these next 5 games with 2 wins. Look for the Angels to have 3 game lead come Monday unless the A’s young pitching, minus ace Rich Harden, pull off a miracle. I personally think if the A’s don’t win 3 out of their next 5, they are out of the playoff race all together.

The wild card should end up being a two team sprint between the Indians and the Yankees. The Indians have a 1 game lead and a schedule that has them playing the Royals 7 times, the White Sox 6, and

Tampa

3. The Yankees play 2 more with Devil Rays (who lead the season series 11-6), 8 with

Baltimore

, 3 with

Toronto

, and the season ending 3 games in

Boston

.

The Indians should go no worse than 5-2 vs. the Royals, and will most likely take 2 out of 3 vs. the D-Rays at the Jake. That’s 7-4, leaving 6 with the White Sox, with one of the those series being the last 3 games of the year when the Sox will have already clinched the division. Since the playoffs start the Tuesday after the season, you can expect the White Sox will pitch Mark Buehrle the Thursday before the playoffs to have him set up to pitch game 1 of the ALDS, and have Garland pitch Friday (game 1 of the Indian series) to have him ready for game 2.

Garland

will only go 4 or 5 innings that game and the rest of the weekend will be an exhibition of White Sox minor leaguers. So you can assume the Indians will win at least 2 of those games, if not all 3, bringing their record to 9-5/10-4.

So the biggest series for the Indians will come this Monday, the 19^th in

Chicago

. Since the Indians are closing in on Chicago that series will be the biggest series the White Sox, or the Indians, will have played all season to date. The outcome of this 3 game series will have a biggest impact on the playoff picture.

Even if the Indians lose 2 out of 3 next week in Chicago that will give them 10 or 11 more wins, and 93 or 94 for the season. Giving the White Sox enough cushion to coast into the finish line.

This brings us back to the Yankees, at 81-62. The Yankees will need to go at least 12-7 to force a 1 game playoff with the Indians (which will be in

Cleveland

). Which means they need to win at least 1 more in Tampa (which I think they will) and take 4 out of 6 against the Jays (which I also think they will) giving them a 5 more wins (86)

That leaves 8 games with struggling Baltimore Orioles. Asking someone to win 7 games, against any team, is a lot. 5 is not enough. 6 should be the target number. That would give the Yanks 92 wins headed into

Boston

for that final weekend. The Yankees HAVE to go into a

Boston

in a position to need to win just 1 game, even if

Boston

has already won the AL East. You know the Sox would like nothing more than to rid themselves of the Yankees headed into the Playoffs. While the Sox won’t destroy their rotation to do it, they will certainly play all their regulars.

This September will be the most exciting playoff race in the American League since 1995. You can expect the wild card to still be undecided come the final weekend with the possibility of a 1 game playoff looming after we have already played 162. Each game will be packed with playoff tension, and right in the middle of it are the K.C Royals and Tampa Devil Rays, who will play major roles in deciding who makes the playoffs. Who would have ever though that?

Prediction:

AL East:

Boston

(96-66)

AL Central:

Chicago

(99-63)

AL West: L.A Angels (90-72)

And

Wild Card: Cleveland (94-68)….I just think the schedule favors the Indians. The 7 with KC and season ending weekend series with the resting White Sox I think will produce 8 or 9 wins. The Yankees will need a win the last day of the season to force a 1 game playoff with the Indians…and not get it…

Very early playoff predictions

Division Series

Boston

over

Cleveland

in 4

Anaheim

over

Chicago

in 5

ALCS

Anaheim

over

Boston

in 6

Monday Morning Quarterback: NFL Week One

Mack10's NFL Round Up Week One 9-11-05

The NFL regular season is unlike any other in professional sports. NFL games mean something from the opening day kickoff. There are only 16 games, and as each one comes and goes, the stakes get a little higher. There is no room for error. Slow starts equal lost seasons. Teams must come ready to play week 1, as these games are as important as late August inter-division baseball games. Week 1 is where teams create their identity, and starting the season with an L, especially in New York, usually causes panic and overreaction

When teams kicked off this past Sunday fans were already in midseason rooting form, cause they know, after week 1, over 6% of the season is over…and 1-0 looks a lot better than 0-1.

For a look back at Week 1 of the NFL season, games will be grouped into classes of importance.

Level 1 Importance: Games that were out of conference, division, or that were really nothing more than the 1st game of the season

49ERS 28 ST. LOUIS 25: In a weekly pool I’m in, 24 out of 25 people took the Rams. That is always a surefire sign to bet the other way. The 49ers came out ready to play for new coach Mike Nolan, while The Rams laid an egg in their road opener. Coming in to Sunday, the Rams were 7-19 on the road in their last 26 games. When are people going to realize Mike Martz is not a good coach? The Rams will bounce back, and the 49ers will come back to Earth. A nice win start to the Mike Nolan era for the 49ers, but no reason to start to selling playoff tickets yet.

WASHINGTON 9 CHICAGO 7: : In a predictably awful game the Redskins did just enough to beat the Bears and rookie QB Kyle Orton. The Bears are my sleeper pick for the 2005 season. Don’t be shocked to see them win a few a games they have no business being in. The Redskins are already playing musical QB’s. Mark Brunell will get the start Monday night against The Cowboys. It’s going to be long season for Joe Gibbs and the Redskins.

JACKSONVILLE 26 SEATTLE 14: An AFC team beats an NFC team. A trend you will see continue this year. Jacksonville looks ready to play with the Colts. They play this Sunday at the RCA Dome.